


The one with the walk back together

by akachankami



Series: Shippers Anonymous [17]
Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Dialogue, Episode 2, Episode Tag, F/M, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-12-10 21:07:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11699913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akachankami/pseuds/akachankami
Summary: Prompt:"Mr. Carson, shall we… walk back together?" Elsie scurried to catch up to him when he paused to consider her question, smiling to herself when he shuffled to place her to the inside, the way any gentleman would for his lady. They walked along in companionable silence until the Abbey came into view from a small rise in the road. Turning to look down, he studied her with unabashed curiosity, causing her to blush and turn her own gaze to study the tips of their shoes between them.





	The one with the walk back together

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote a tumblr dialogue following that scene before receiving this prompt so I decided this is a sequel to said dialogue... that's why I shall paste it here as well and that's why the first part is plain dialogue.

Elsie: Are you torturing yourself with 'what ifs' now?

Charles: No, I did that for so many years...

Elsie: Do you regret it?

Charles: I think... Alice made her choice and regretted it all her life, making her marriage an unhappy one. And who knows if she ever really loved me enough. It could have been the same with me. I don't know.

Elsie: [worries her lip]

Charles: I regret not having children.

Elsie: [cries inside]

Charles: Have you ever wanted children Mrs Hughes?

Elsie: I suppose, I never met the right person (when I could) but I'm happy with my life, now. Aren't you, Mr Carson?

Charles: Sure, I am, Mrs Hughes

* * *

He speaks again then: "If it weren't for you, Mrs Hughes, fishing through my wastepaper basket, I would have never known."

She blushes then, embarrassed, knowing what she did was indeed wrong in the first place. Yet not regretting it in the least. He seems to have stitched his wounds and maybe got his heart fixed as well.

"Thank you," he adds as an afterthought, feeling her discomfort.

"This means," she asks cautious "you're not mad at me anymore?"

She can see from the corner of her eye he wears a shy smile and is looking at the ground now. "No Mrs Hughes, I'm not," he answers "but don't make a habit of it," he admonishes with a chuckle.

She smiles back up at him thinking she should feel relieved. But she's not. The house is just a few turns of the path ahead now and everything will soon go back to normal. Back to being  _the butler_  and  _the housekeeper_ , back to sharing leftover wine and cups of tea late at night and not talking about past heartbreaks and future prospects. She feels this is the end of the road.

Then he does something she wasn't expecting: he sorts a picture from his breast pocket, Alice's, and tears it in half. And then tears those halves in quarters till the image is unrecognizable, letting its confetti fall at his feet.

She watches silent till he looks up at her but there is no anger or heartbreak in his eyes and she thinks his puzzled expression is in fact answering her mortified look. "I'm so sorry, this is not what you hoped for, Mr carson."

He smiles weakly: "Sometimes we're better off the things we want most." And she cannot help thinking about finally letting go of him too, be brave enough to admit she never had a chance, let their friendship be just that… She's happy with her life now, isn't she?

"Thank you for not giving up on my stubborn self, Mrs Hughes," he says when they are now a few steps from the back door.

"Nonsense," she answers.

He's talking about getting him to meet Grigg and remember Alice, find closure and yet… her resolution wavers.

She hides her emotions behind a smile, prays for her voice not to falter and looks him in the eyes: "You are my favourite person, Mr carson."


End file.
